情商：为什么情商比智商更重要（第2版）

智商和情商这两种竞争力因素不是相互对立的，而是相互独立、相辅相成的。每个人的智商和情商高低程度各不相同，但是所谓高智商但低情商的人（或低智商但高情商的人）其实是比较罕见的——尽管我们有这样的刻板印象。智商与情商的某些方面其实存在着微弱的关联，尽管微弱得可以认为它们大体上是独立的。

与常见的智商测试不同的是，目前我们还没有单独的、用纸笔答题的情商测试来给人们的情商打分，这种情商测试也许永远都不会出现。我们对情商的各个要素进行了大量研究，其中一些要素，比如同理心，可以通过对个体完成任务的实际能力进行抽样加以测验，比如让受测者看录像，根据他人的面部表情来识别情绪。加利福尼亚大学伯克利分校的心理学家杰克·布莱克运用他称之为“自我复原”（ego resilience）的测试方法（包含主要的社交和情绪竞争力，与情商的测试方法近似），对两种理论上的纯粹类型——高智商的人和高情商的人进行了对比研究。^[15]两者的差异非常显著。

高智商纯粹类型（即不考虑其情商）接近于漫画中对知识分子的描述，在理性王国如鱼得水，在人际社会则四处碰壁。这种类型的男女只有微小的差别。高智商男性的典型是智力活动的兴趣和能力很广泛。他野心勃勃，工作有效率，刻板乏味，顽强不屈，而且对外界的议论毫不在意。他还喜欢批评，自视甚高，过分讲究和拘束，对性和感官体验感到不自在，不善表达，感情超然，沉稳冷静。

与之形成鲜明对比的是，高情商男性热爱社交，外向乐观，不容易受到恐惧和焦虑的困扰。他们乐于为他人或事业奉献，具有很强的责任感和道德感，富有同情心，对他人关怀备至。他们的情绪生活很丰富，但又恰如其分，他们对自身、他人以及所处的社会感到很自在。

纯粹的高智商女性理所当然地对智力很有自信，能够流畅地表达自己的思想，注重与智力有关的问题，对智力和审美拥有广泛的兴趣。她们往往比较内向，容易焦虑，凡事想得过多，容易产生内疚感，而且不愿意公开表达她们的愤怒（不过她们会间接地表达）。

高情商女性则正好相反，她们总是过于自信，喜欢直接表达情感，自我感觉良好。人生对她们来说充满了意义。和高情商男性一样，她们外向，热爱交际，并会恰当地表达自己的感受（而不是突然爆发情绪，事后感到后悔），善于处理压力。她们热爱社交生活，很容易结交新朋友；她们对自身感到很自在，对感官体验很轻松，态度自然，而且毫不讳言。与纯粹高智商女性不同的是，她们很少感到焦虑或内疚，或者陷入沉思难以自拔。

上述描述显然都是极端的例子，每个人的智商和情商高低程度都有所不同。不过我们可以据此清楚地观察到每个方面都会对个体的素质产生独立的作用。每个人都不同程度地同时具有认知和情绪智力，两者融为一体。但是相对而言，情绪智力对个人的全面发展所起到的作用更为显著。

1. Jason H.’s story was reported in “Warning by a Valedictorian Who FacedPrison,” in The New YorkTimes (June 23,1992).
2. One observer notes: Howard Gardner, “Cracking Open the IQ Box,” The American Prospect,Winter 1995.
3. Richard Herrnstein and Charles Murray,T he Bell Curve: Intelligence and Class Structure inAmerican Life (New York: Free Press, 1994), p. 66.
4. George Vaillant, Adaptation to Life (Boston: Little, Brown, 1977). The average SAT score of theHarvard group was 584, on a scale where 800 is tops.Dr. Vaillant, now at Harvard University MedicalSchool, told me about the relatively poor predictive value of test scores for life success in this groupofadvantaged men.
5. J. K. Felsman and G. E. Vaillant, “Resilient Children as Adults: A 40-YearStudy,” in E. J.Anderson and B. J. Cohler, eds., The Invulnerable Child (NewYork: Guilford Press, 1987).
6. Karen Arnold, who did the study of valedictorians with Terry Denny at the University of Illinois,was quoted in The Chicago Tribune (May 29,1992).
7. Project Spectrum: Principal colleagues of Gardner in developing ProjectSpectrum were MaraKrechevsky and David Feldman.
8. I interviewed Howard Gardner about his theory of multiple intelligences in“Rethinking the Value ofIntelligence Tests,” in The New York Times Education Supplement (Nov. 3,1986) and several timessince.
9. The comparison of IQ tests and Spectrum abilities is reported in a chapter,coauthored with MaraKrechevsky, in Howard Gardner, Multiple Intelligences:The Theory in Practice (New York: BasicBooks, 1993).
10. The nutshell summary is from Howard Gardner, Multiple Intelligences , p. 9.
11. Howard Gardner and Thomas Hatch, “Multiple Intelligences Go to School,” EducationalResearcher IS ,8 (1989).
12. The model of emotional intelligence was first proposed in Peter Saloveyand John D. Mayer,“Emotional Intelligence,”I magination, Cognition, andPersonality 9 (1990), pp. 185-211.
13. Practical intelligence and people skills: Robert J. Sternberg, Beyond I.Q. (New York: CambridgeUniversity Press, 1985).
14. The basic definition of “emotional intelligence” is in Salovey and Mayer,“Emotional Intelligence,” p. 189.
15. IQ vs. emotional intelligence: Jack Block, University of California at Berkeley, unpublishedmanuscript, February, 1995. Block uses the concept“ego resilience” rather than emotional intelligence,but notes that its main components include emotional self-regulation, an adaptive impulse control, asense of self-efficacy, and social intelligence. Since these are main elements of emotional intelligence,ego resilience can be seen as a surrogate measure for emotional intelligence, much like SAT scores arefor IQ. Block analyzed data from a longitudinal study of about a hundred men and women in their teenyears and early twenties, and used statistical methods to assess the personality and behavioral correlatesof high IQ independent of emotional intelligence, and emotional intelligence apart from IQ. There is, hefinds, a modest correlation between IQ and ego resilience, but the two are independent constructs.
16. SAT即Scholastic Assessment Test，是美国高中生进入大学的标准入学考试。——译者注
17. 计算机术语，计算机工程师把电脑硬件和软件之外的“人脑”称为湿件。——译者注